welcome to emotional feelings, 4!

defenseless

Home
deceived
dedicated
defeated
defective
defenseless
defensive
defiant
degraded
dejected
demeaned
demoralized
denial
dependent
depressed
deprived
desired
despair
desperation / desperate
truly desperate
detached
determined
devastated
devious
devoted
dignified
disappointed
disconnected
discontented
discouraged
disgusted
dishonest
disillusioned
dismal
disrespected
dissatisfied
distanced - distant
distracted
disturbed
distressed
doubtful - doubted
dysfunctional

 
nowhere within the emotional feelings network of sites is any opportunity for me to make any profit from any of the 28 + sites within this network. this network of sites has been put together as a personal mission to help others by informing those who need information concerning mental health, eating disorders, lifestyle factors, and every other topic listed within.

navigational hint: all underlined link words open up a new window instead of changing your present one, taking you to another site within the emotional feelings network of sites - or to another site referencing the underlined link word!

welcome to the emotional feelings, 4 website!

 It's very important that you visit the next page: keeping in touch!
 
Reason being: If you're here because you're searching for an answer to your feelings of dissatisfaction, unhappiness, feeling sick, or just general feelings of misery in your life - you need to find a volunteer opportunity that you feel comfortable with.
 
For a life changing listen - click here - it's truly life changing and something we all need to listen to. It does take some time to listen to Randy Pausch's Last Lecture, but you won't regret it.
 
You can help yourself by helping others. You might not think so; but it's true. Find something you can do to help some worthy causes. "Keeping in Touch" will show you some important causes that need you!
 
Why not just click here now to get it over with! So even if you leave this site after finding some information concerning an emotion or feeling... you'll also leave with the seed of thought concerning volunteer work that might produce some results bringing you a sense of accomplishment & find yourself feeling better!

remembering september eleventh
forever free: remembering september eleventh
always & forever

Your dictionary definition of:

de·fense

n.

  1. The act of defending against attack, danger, or injury.
  2. A means or method of defending or protecting.
  3. The science or art of defending oneself; self-defense.

de·fense less adj.

adj

1: lacking protection or support; "a defenseless child" [syn: defenceless]

2: having no protecting or concealing cover; "naked to mine enemies"- Shakespeare [syn: naked]

3: lacking weapons for self-defense [syn: defenceless] adv : without defense; "the child was standing in the middle of the crossfire, defenselessly" [syn: defencelessly]

 welcome...
 
i'm really glad to see you!
 
you've found your way to
 
the emotional feelings network of sites
 
"emotional feelings, 4"
emotions & feelings beginning with the letter "d"
 
What was once - (five years ago) - only
"anxiety understanding"
is now an entire network of self-help personal growth & recovery journey informational websites.
 
I welcome you to
"the homepage of emotional feelings, 4!"
which, if you read it thru to the bottom will explain what is included in the entire network of 28+ sites.
 
 
kathleen

click here to visit anxieties 101!

5 years ago I was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder, depression & I was also experiencing an eating disorder that no one knew anything about; night eating.
 
While I was miserable in experiencing all the symptoms of post traumatic stress, an anxiety disorder & depression - which often accompanies anxiety disorders; I was overjoyed in finally finding out what was wrong with me!

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Why would someone spend 1000's of hours designing & keeping up these websites to offer free information to others?

I have to reply - "You're absolutely right! It does take many, many hours each day to work on these sites. I'm a mother, a wife & an individual who has tons of personal work to do as well as the usual family responsibilities!
 
How would I find the time?
 
Why do I do it? I use the opportunity to combine my own recovery - personal growth journey with an important concept that I've made a commitment to:
 
"Helping yourself thru helping others..." 
 
I was so excited when after years of searching for the answer to my everyday question, "What's wrong with me?" that I felt determined to show others that if you don't quit & you know the path to take, you can find your answers as well!

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My immediate concern was "mental health." While I didn't know what was wrong with me, I did have one medical specialist tell me that my physical pain was due to a "mental problem."
 
I didn't quite understand it all, I was wallowing in many different symptoms of mental illness like panic attacks, severe anxiety & finally my eating disorder symptoms of waking up numerous times in the night to eat.
 
Just as you may have seen recently on either public service television commercials for depression or in your doctor's office waiting room; mental illness can manifest itself in physical symptoms that include many sources of discomfort. I was also experiencing the symptoms of "irritable bowel syndrome," that had started early on in my life.
 
So I started with the mental health site that now exists within the network:
 
 
(be sure to read the following description)

i've made this cake! it's fantastic!

I've reached a point in my own personal recovery & growth journey that I believe I can describe accurately most of the emotions & feelings within the emotional feelings network of sites without using any information from anyone else.
 
But since the ruination of the "extremely emotional" site - I had to stop & ask myself - remembering to be aware & mindful of what's happening in my present moment -
 
"Why did this happen to me?" (the unreasonable ruin of my site, of course!) 
 
or - Choosing to seek a positive return for a negative energy passing my way - what would the positive ramifications be of having to go through every single page of a network of 28+ sites to delete the links to my ruined site?
 
Geez... now that I think of it... I've asked myself that question quite a few times before... "Why did this happen to me?" & I searched & searched for an answer, wasting time & positive energy on something very simple... Life is what's happening. Just look to find the positive about it instead of the negative
 
This is what I am looking for now in all aspects of my life. I'm looking for the "positive" reasons things happen. I remember what I've learned from my past to be prepared to have to confront negativities with my re-gained "power & control" on my side now instead of the enemy; but I choose now to look upon the face of countenance instead of upheaval.
 
After pondering a few days on this subject, while going through every page of the emotional feelings site - here - to unlink all the emotion & feelings words "s" thru the end of the alphabet - I realized something magnificent.
 
"This is my opportunity to take the time to check ALL linked words to be sure they're being directed to the correct places. This is my opportunity to re-check spelling & grammar. This is my opportunity to try to express in my own words - the most meaningful knowledge I've recently acquired!
 
I'll write what I've learned about the whole cake, almost 6 years of growth - not just reveal a the first piece of the cake! - I still offer other author's works to explain situational inferences to emotions & feelings!
 
I'll try to the best of my ability to explain the importance of every emotion & feeling. I'm honored you chose the emotional feelings network of sites to visit!
 
kathleen

c'mon!!! click the link and send me an e-mail!

click here to send me an e-mail now!

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welcome! to emotional feelings, 4!

 

after looking things over here at emotional feelings, 4, try out "the layer down under," (part of the emotional feelings network of sites) & read a special "i just gotta say it" column concerning porn addiction by clicking here! Be sure to scroll down towards the bottom of the right hand column to find it!
 
just another great suggestion... visit the homepage! you can read more about the emotional feelings network of sites there, as well as, a heads up about who is feeling what emotions within the network each month!

click on the box below to read my monthly column!

click here to read it now!

 
click here!  Bob Woodruff: Turning Personal Injury Into Public Inquiry click here!
 
I was personally very touched by this inspiring story as I watched it on television last night (2/27/07); especially after I experienced a life altering injury which took me 2 years to recover from.
 
What I want to ask you is...
If you can't help out with the helmets, below for our military men, can you volunteer or help our returning soldiers who are recovering with extreme traumatic brain injury?
 
Here are some links!
Check them out, I know that my family will be searching for a way we can help! Remember that those with traumatic injuries might develop mental health problems.
 
 
 

What is Operation Helmet?

Founded in 2003 by Dr. Robert H. Meaders whose grandson is an active duty Marine in Iraq, Operation Helmet is a nonpartisan 501(c)(3) organization dedicated to providing safer helmet pad upgrade kits to the troops in Iraq & Afghanistan. To date, more than 6,000 kits have been shipped to the troops in the field.

click this green line to visit the site!
click here!
keeping things organized!

How this site works best for you!
 
You'll notice that there are many underlined link words in each article below. The reason for this is that you have reached not only, "emotional feelings, 4," but the emotional feelings network of sites. There are many sites included within the network that'll be visited by clicking on these underlined link words.
 
The reason for this opportunity is very simple & yet you may be unnerved by all those underlined words! I've been in recovery from post traumatic stress disorder, depression & many other dysfunctional ventures & thru it all I've discovered that emotion & feeling work may be the missing link that many people miss when trying to find solutions to their problems.
 
Developing a sense of curiosity about why you feel the way you do, is essential in finding the solution you so desperately are searching for.
 
If you can't find what you came here looking for, visit the homepage for the emotional feelings network of sites by clicking above & read the options on the homepage for the networks index of sites. Try to be specific when looking for an emotion or feeling word & click on the site you need!
 
It's very simple & very interesting to follow your way thru the layers of your buried or stuffed emotions & feelings that have accumulated throughout the years!
 
when you've reached this point, or this website, you know you're making progress!!!! this part gets difficult because now is the time to look within & become emotionally honest with yourself!!!
 
Best of luck & if you're still stuck, send me an e-mail anytime, by clicking here & I'll be glad to send you an immediate personal response!
 
Sincerely,
Kathleen

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Grandma’s Love, Part III: Defenseless Power by Edith Pounds Bernard

The distraught parent knew every method of child discipline existing in the mid 50’s.

She kept my Mother outside the nursery, while she discussed them all. She thought one of them, done correctly, would make her 2 year-old manageable.

The problem was, her Allen was a “Hitter.” Using his fists, he hit everyone, even his parents & care - providers. He was so violent no one would care for him. Nothing she had tried helped; not rewards, isolation, spanking, or even tying his hand down.  Now, in desperation, she was trying the “Magic Grandma” she had heard about. My Mom.

Inside the nursery I had gotten Allen settled.  When Mom came in he was trucking blocks across the table with Ken, one of our regulars. Everything seemed peaceful.

Abruptly, for no apparent reason, Allen hit Ken. Responding, Ken struck Allen with his truck.  Allen drew his fist back to strike again. Mom caught it.  Holding it firmly, she lifted Ken into the next chair with her other hand & sat between the two. “I can’t allow you to hit each other,” she said, “& I know you don’t want to do that. If you must hit someone, hit me. I can’t be hurt.”

Ken refused. Allen, after a puzzled moment, hit her experimentally. She nodded & smiled. He hit her several more times with more force, then lost control. Humming, Mom looked straight ahead, a smile on her face & calm in her eyes. She seemed to be an indestructible force pretending to be human. It was a sight I’ve never forgotten.

Allen’s fists blurred & seemed to vanish as bruises appeared on Mom’s arm. He started crying & his swings became wild; sometimes connecting & sometimes hitting nothing. Weeping, he broke off the attack, but Mom seemed not to notice until he slumped against her. Then, still humming softly, she put her arm around him & rocked. I offered tissues, but she warned me away.

Finally Allen looked at Mom as if seeing her for the first time. Sniffing, he wiped his nose on his shirt sleeve. Mom gave him a tissue & he wiped his eyes, then she gently finished the job. Standing, she lifted him & carried him around the room, whispering in his ear. He frowned, then smiled, then laughed.

Beaming, Mom stood him on the floor. “I see you like our secret,” she said. “If you forget, I’ll help you remember.” Allen nodded, then ran to play with Ken. They became friends.

On the following Sundays I sometimes saw Allen make a fist & start to hit someone.

He always stopped & ran to Mom. Tugging urgently on her skirt, he would cry, “Grandma! Secret!”  She always bent down & whispered in his ear. He always laughed & ran back to his play.

Children’s Riddle:  The Course says, “What is not love is always fear & nothing else.” (T-15.X.4:5)  If this is true, can we really fear someone we love?

Course Clue: “Complexity is of the ego & is nothing more than the ego’s attempt to obscure the obvious.”   (T-15.IV.6:2)

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Editorial: Survivors, support group need one another
Carolina Morning News

Hope Cottage Inc., the nonprofit providing children's advocacy & rape crisis services in the Lowcountry, is taking on another traditionally taboo topic. Starting Tuesday, the organization will offer a weekly support group for male survivors of sex abuse. The "Breaking the Silence" meetings are a crucial step in beginning the healing process, experts say.

It also can be a giant leap for men grappling w/the "taboo" factor, feeling defenseless, misperceptions of homosexuality & misplaced shame.

The facts dispel the myths. Many male survivors were abused as children, when they were smaller & physically defenseless against adult perpetrators. Of the children who were counseled for abuse last year in the Lowcountry, about 1/2 were male. And generally, most sex abusers are male & heterosexual.

Attendees have an opportunity Tuesday to not only share their stories of abuse, perhaps for the first time, but to hear about others' experiences.

"
There’s something powerful about being able to name the evil, name the crime," said Shauw Chin Capps, Hope Cottage executive director.

There's also power in numbers.

Support group facilitator Wade Bishop, also a male survivor, said finding out they're not alone is an important part of victims' learning to "live with" the abuse.

The group's overall goal is to show men the effects of abuse on their lives & the steps to recovery, all in a safe & confidential environment.

Hope Cottage & Bishop already have taken the first step. Now it's up to survivors in the 4 counties served by the organization to take the next, often daunting step.

As of Thursday, only one man had committed to the first meeting. Attendance is a personal decision that each survivor should make. But the problem with issues deemed unspeakable is that silence only compounds their effect on the victims while allowing offenders to continue the abuse.

By speaking out to fellow survivors or to law enforcement authorities, these men can eliminate the power an abuser has to affect their well-being psychologically, emotionally & physically. The shame of abuse is transferred to where it should’ve always been - on the offender

Defenseless Children

Center helps kids caught in juvenile justice system

By Elizabeth Wu

 

When Miriam Jones discovered the Children's Law Center after weeks of searching for help with her grandchildren's case, she says she almost fell over.

"Somebody cares!" she said.

Based in Covington but expanding to Ohio, the Children's Law Center is a legal service center established in 1989. Its goal is to protect the rights of children thru legal representation, research, policy work, training & education of attorneys & others about the rights of children. All of their services are free to children & families.

Jones (a pseudonym) says caution is necessary because her grandchildren's case hasn't been heard yet.

"We were told there may be retaliation," she says.

The uncertainty she feels concerning legal protocol is typical of her experience with the criminal justice system since her grandchildren were arrested.

"It's a totally helpless feeling when no one will talk to you," Jones says. "The public defenders will not speak with parents at all. They say they work for the children, not the parents & it's the children's best interest they're looking out for. I beg to differ. They speak only to the children. How are children going to understand? We were told that the kids understand the court system because they watch TV. I say, 'Garbage!' Children really don't understand the seriousness of some things. It's a very frightening situation."

Kim Brooks, executive director of the Children's Law Center, says Jones' feelings of helplessness & frustration aren't unique.

"Parents often contact us when they're frustrated with the systems in place designed to help their kids," Brooks says. "Frequently they're experiencing the dilemma of their child being yet another number among high caseloads or have a need where the child simply doesn't have access to an attorney."

Last year the center collaborated w/the American Bar Association's National Juvenile Defender Center & the Juvenile Justice Coalition to research Ohio's defense system for indigent juveniles. The study included surveying of judges, magistrates, defense attorneys, detention center superintendents, interviews with hundreds of incarcerated youths & visits to juvenile courts.

In March 2003 the center released the report, Justice Cut Short: An Assessment of Access to Counsel & Quality of Representation in Juvenile Delinquency Proceedings in Ohio.

"No particular counties were singled out," Brooks says. "We did use secondary data, however, available thru county juvenile court annual reports, to indicate problem areas. In this respect, several areas were of concern regarding Hamilton County practices; i.e., 25% of the kids in the adult prison system come from this county. Also, there were dozens of young kids being detained & I mean kids as young as 8-10 years old, in the detention center."

The study found Hamilton County has the highest detention rate of any of the major metropolitan areas, 250% more per capita than Cleveland & 200% more per capita than Columbus, according to Brooks.

"Yet even with this high number, the felony adjudication rate is the same as Cleveland, so it’s hard to make an argument we have kids committing more serious offenses here," she says. "Probably even more disturbing, however, is that 50 to 60% of kids in the delinquency system, by the county's own statistics, go without lawyers thru this process. There are concerns not only about kids not getting lawyers, but the quality of representation provided as well."

Jones says the report opened her eyes.

"I read that report & was appalled," she says. "How many children are in there that don't need to be, because they were lost in the system? I'm afraid there's a lot of racial tones there. Much of it’s political. They say children are read their rights. Tell me a frightened-to-death kid, handcuffed & thrown into a police car - in that kind of situation, what kid is going to think rationally? A lot of them, if they think they're innocent & they don't go with public defenders, they don't have a chance."

Juvenile Court Judge Thomas R. Lipps acknowledges the wide span of the report & the detailed work that went into it. However, he believes it has holes, especially regarding some of the positive aspects of the Hamilton County court system.

For example, Lipps says Hamilton County is the only county in Ohio to require public defenders for trials that could result in a child going to an adult jail.

"All the cases where kids are facing severe restraint of liberty - we make sure every one of those kids has an attorney," he says. "Some think all kids coming into juvenile court should have an attorney. I think it's wrong to force juvenile defendants & their parents to have an attorney if they don't want one & pay for it or have the taxpayer pay for it."

Lipps says there's another positive trait unique to Hamilton County Juvenile Court.

"We have a juvenile public defender's office right there in the courthouse," he says. "They'll see (juveniles) w/out an appointment there & then. It's very convenient & easy for them to have access to public defenders."

A lot of time went into preparing the report, but its criticism of Hamilton County is sometimes off the mark, according to Lipps.

"It appears to be critical of the fact that Hamilton County sends more kids over to adult systems than other counties," he says. "I think we're correct on this. Several years ago the legislature made mandatory some of the things we're doing here. There's a lot of good things about Hamilton County Juvenile Court & I fear when I read these that people might think we're lousy courts."

Eileen Cooper Reed, executive director of the Children's Defense Fund Ohio, a nonprofit organization that does policy & advocacy work, says she speaks from experience when she criticizes the juvenile justice system.

"I know (the report) is accurate," she says. "I used to be a juvenile court referee. It's unquestionable there's a lack of (legal) representation for African Americans & that African Americans are over-represented in the justice system."

Jones, who studied criminal justice in college & worked for a while in law enforcement, says most people find out about the juvenile justice system only thru personal experience.

"Nobody knows until somebody gets pushed into it," she says. "And the problem is, once y